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Took a red-eye home from LA last night

Me [as we're landing, waking up]:
Euuughh. Are we here?
Mid-level executive in snappy-casual loafers sitting next to me:
Yeah. And I'll have you know I was a good Seat Husband.
Me:
Sorry, what?
Dude:
Seat Husband. Remember? I tapped you on the shoulder before we took off and asked you if I could put my bag in the middle seat and you said sure as long as I'd be your Seat Husband.
Me:
Oh god, I think I was sleep talking.
Dude:
I don't know, you were very lucid.
Me:
I took a sleeping thing though. A sleep aid.
Dude:
Well you were very polite. You said I could use the seat as long as I made sure nobody stole your wallet.
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